After the Hurricane
Surreal. I am not sure if there is a better word to describe
it.
A week ago we were preparing for a hurricane. It was a
halfhearted effort as we danced back and forth across the line between
preparedness and hype. For as long as I have lived here severe weather events
could be described by words like: inconvenient, uncomfortable, or an adventure (like
sleeping in the back yard as a kid was an adventure). The danger aspect of
storms was isolated and short lived (unless someone acted stupid – and there
are always a few who do). It wasn’t that New Yorkers didn’t think it could
happen here, as my Companion pointed out; it is just that it never had…
Then, under the light of the full moon, in came Sandy with
the tide…
Even after the worst storms things are back to a relative
normal here in a few days… Call it denial, willful ignorance, arrogance: call
it whatever you want but most people here really expected Sandy to be the same
- Even after it hit… Even after the lights went out… Even when they woke the
next day and looked around… Even after they saw the pictures on TV… But here it is almost a week later and things
aren’t back to normal… Normal will sooner be redefined…
We – my family and I - are blessed to be in a place that has
been relatively unaffected. It has been inconvenient, uncomfortable, a bit of
an adventure but nothing perilous. But the other three sides of our block and a
lot of other patches in our neighborhood are still without power. A mile south
of us, flooded basements are being gutted in hopes of minimizing mold and
contamination. Beyond that is the Queens war zone sans enemy; Broad Channel,
Rockaway, Far Rockaway, Breezy Point… Top it off those areas can only be
reached, coming or going, by car. Even if you have one, and less here do than
don’t, gas is getting harder to come by…
New Yorkers do not take kindly to being called victims. Let
me let you in on a secret – no-one does! The title of “Victim” implies
powerless, helpless, weak. Even when voiced by the best intentioned, it creates
a sense of ‘us’ and ‘them’. “Victim” is an impediment. It gives the power to
the helper. In the face of a task so daunting, we need to feel empowered. Call
your neighbors neighbors. Call your friends friends. Heck – you can call a
stranger a stranger who you can see needs a hand. Help is easier to give than
to ask for. The word “Victim” can make it harder…
Right now, as I write this, there are a lot of people who
need a hand. Many have never had to ask for help beyond their immediate family
before. Few have ever faced a situation like they are facing now. Some are
behaving poorly in the face of adversity. Most are behaving honorably. Even
those like my family, who were effected minimally by the storm itself, are
facing residual and unexpected challenges. We are all moving forward towards
the new normal.
No one is quite sure what it is going to feel like - but we
are sure that life hasn’t gotten back to it yet. Normal doesn’t feel so
surreal.
Six Ways to Respond
Send a care package or an envelope with $20 in it to a
random address at the edge of an impacted zone. Ask the addressee to use or
deliver to a family in need. Trust that stranger to do what is right.
Support a small business or Etsy vendor in an effected area
by ordering holiday gifts from them.
Foster a pet for a displaced family.
When people are tired, upset, lost, angry, cold, confused,
etc, acknowledge that no-one is at their best when they feel that way and don’t
take it personally.
When you are tired, upset, lost, angry, cold, confused, etc
try not to take it out on others.
Send thank-you letters to first responders.
